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R
Z
3
7
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The Royal
Succession Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: King Robert I (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS succession to the
Somewhat Battered Throne of Talossa is governed according
to the House Law of the House and Dynasty of Madison
(dated 11 February 1989 and published with the March,
1989 Clark); and
- WHEREAS the current House Law
designates that, in the absence of any legal heirs of the
current Monarch, that the Throne shall pass (in the case
of his demise or abdication) to the other descendants of
Harry L. Madison, the King's father; and
- WHEREAS this principle means
that Jennifer L. Madison, the King's sister, is currently
the Heir Apparent to the Talossan Throne; but
- WHEREAS Jennifer has never
demonstrated any interest in inheriting the Throne, the
Ziu hereby amends Article 5 of the House Law to read as
follows;
- "In default of a successor
entitled to the Crown by virtue of the three preceding
articles, the King may designate his successor by public
letter to the Ziu, to be ratified thereby through a
two-thirds majority.
- "If such appointed successor of
the King shall have died before the King, his descendants
shall take his place..." [Remainder of article
unchanged.]
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R
Z
3
8
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The
Florenciâ Decertification
Act
Uréu
q'estadra så: Matt Dabrowski (PC-Vuode)
Withdrawn for
inorganicity.
WHEREAS the Organic Law
confers full autonomy upon provinces which have been
certified by the Ziu; andWHEREAS the the
Governemnt of the Province of Florenciâ has
effectively defaulted; andWHEREAS Florenciâ
has nearly no provincially active
citizens;THEREFORE the Ziu votes
herewith to remove the Certification of Florenciâ
Province.
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R
Z
3
9
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An Act to Provide
for a Year Zero in the Talossan Calendar
Uréu q'estadra
så: Jay Shorten (Lib-Vuode)
- WHEREAS most people do not know
that the third Millennium of the Christian, or civil,
calendar does not begin on 1 January 2000, but 1 January
2001; and
- WHEREAS this confusion has
taken places because there is no Year 0 (Zero) in the
Christian calendar; and
- WHEREAS we do not want to see a
similar confusion among Talossan citizens about the
Talossan calendar around the year MM;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby
resolves that:
- 1. The Talossan year XX will
end on 31 December 1999 AD, and the year XXI shall
therefore begin on 1 January 2000 AD.
2. All subsequent years of the
Talossan calendar, i.e. after Year XX, shall henceforth
begin on 1 January and end on 31 December.
3. All years prior to the
founding of the Kingdom of Talossa, i.e. 1978 AD and
before, shall also have begun on 1 January and ended on
31 December.
4. The year 1979 AD shall
henceforth be known in the Talossan calendar as Year
0.
- a) Notwithstanding Section
3, said Year 0 shall have begun on 1 January 1979 and
ended on 25 December 1979.
b) Notwithstanding Sections 2
and 3, the years I to XIX shall continue to have begun
on 26 December and ended on 25 December.
c) Notwithstanding Sections 2
and 3, Year XX shall continue to have begun on 26
December 1998 AD.
5. The method of numbering the
years prior to the founding of the Kingdom of Talossa
shall be numbered in a manner deemed suitable by future
Act of Ziu.
6. The short title of this act
shall be the Year Zero Act.
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R
Z
4
0
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An Act to Amend
the Year Zero Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: Jay Shorten (Lib-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the Year Zero Act has
provided for a method of numbering the years prior to the
founding of the Kingdom of Talossa; and
- WHEREAS the years after the
founding are in Roman numerals; and
- WHEREAS the years prior to the
founding ought to be in a method contrasting the Roman
system;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby
resolves that:
- 1. Section 5 of the Year Zero
Act is hereby amended to read:
- The method of numbering the
years prior to the founding of the Kingdom of Talossa
shall be according to the classical Greek numeration
system.
2. The following Schedule shall
be appended to the Year Zero Act:
- SCHEDULE A
The classical Greek
numeration system was additive. The numbers 1-9 were
represented by the letters Alpha, Beta, Gamma, Delta,
Epsilon, Digamma, Zeta, Eta, Theta. The numbers 10-90
were represented by the letters Iota, Kappa, Lambda,
Mu, Nu, Xi, Omicron, Pi, Koppa. The numbers 100-900
were represented by the letters Rho, Sigma, Tau,
Upsilon, Phi, Chi, Psi, Omega, Sampi. 1000 was
represented by an Alpha with a stroke below and on its
left, 2000 by a Beta with a stroke below and on its
left, etc.
A number such as 1453 would
have been represented as [stroke]Alpha Upsilon
Nu Digamma.
See also a Classical Greek
grammar at http://www.perseus.tufts.edu/cgi-bin/text?lookup=smyth+348&vers=english
3. If the Year Zero Act does not
pass, this Act shall be null and void.
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R
Z
4
1
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The You Are Where
You Live Act, Pärts Tres
Uréu q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode) with the blessing of
Uppermost Cort Justice Ken Oplinger
- WHEREAS, in the 1997 version of
this Act (The "You Are Where You Live Act, Part Deux"
from November, 1997), Talossan citizens from some parts
of California were assigned to Florencia province while
others were assigned to Maricopa Province,
and
- WHEREAS, this split-state
treatment of California has been confusing and has caused
the inadvertent reassignment of Ken Oplinger from
Maricopa (the province he founded) to Florencia,
and
- WHEREAS, we seek to unite (or
isolate) all Californian-Talossans in their natural home
province of Maricopa, and
- WHEREAS, it is more convenient
for future users of this bill to refer to a single,
undivided text of this bill rather than flip back and
forth between the March '99 and November '97
Clarks:
- THEREFORE the Ziu of the great
nation of Talossa hereby declares null and void
the text of the original "You Are Where You Live Act,
Part Deux" from November, 1997, and replaces it with the
following text, bearing in mind that the only change is
in the assignment of citizens from northern
California:
- That prospective Talossan
citizens who live in Canada and the U.S. states of
Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Maine, New Hampshire, and
Vermont will be assigned to Kemâl Atatürk
Province (KA); and
- That prospective Talossan
citizens who live in the U.S. states of Illinois,
Indiana, Iowa, Michigan, Ohio, and Pennsylvania will
be assigned to Mussolini Province (MU);
and
- That prospective Talossan
citizens who live in the U.S. states of Connecticut,
Delaware, Maryland, New Jersey, and New York will be
assigned to the Province of Vuode (VD);
and
- That prospective Talossan
citizens who live in the U.S. states of Arizona, New
Mexico, Oklahoma, Texas, Hawaii, and California will
be assigned to Maricopa Province (MA); and
- That prospective Talossan
citizens who live in the U.S. states of Alaska,
Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, Nevada,
Utah, Colorado, North Dakota, South Dakota, Minnesota,
Kansas, and Nebraska will be assigned to the Province
of Florenciâ (FL); and
- That prospective Talossan
citizens who live in the U.S. states of Alabama,
Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Kentucky, Louisiana,
Mississippi, Missouri, North Carolina, South Carolina,
Tennessee, Virginia, West Virginia, and the District
of Columbia, will be assigned to the Province of
Maritiimi-Maxhestic (MM); and
- That the current Cybercit
assignments for Cézembre will continue as they
are currently; and
- That no persons will be
assigned to the Territory of Pengöpäts;
and
- That citizens whose
citizenship bills are currently before the Ziu will be
assigned according to this law if they are approved by
the Ziu.
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R
Z
4
2
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The King of the
Albanians Act
Noi urent q'estadra
så: Matt Dabrowski & R. Ben Madison
(PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS two days before his
forced and unjust exile, Zog, King of the Albanians,
welcomed into the world his only son; and
- WHEREAS this child, Leka Zogu,
has until two years ago been in exile in the Republic of
South Africa, where he his passport and diplomatic
immunity have been revoked; and
- WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa
believes in monarchy in all places, especially in the
Ancient Home of Skanderbeg;
- THEREFORE this Kingdom of
Talossa lends its Invincible Moral Support(tm) to the
rightful King of the Albanians, Leka, and expresses its
wishes that His Majesty return to the Eagle Throne as
soon as possible. Long Live King Leka!
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R
Z
4
3
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An Act to
Determine the Truth of Certain Rumours Floating Around Among
the Cestoûr Population
Uréu q'estadra
så: Jay Shorten (Lib-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the Cestoûrs
having gotten through a failed impreachment, have turned
their minds to other things; and
- WHEREAS the youngest
Cestoûrs watch a certain television programme,
known as the Teletubbies; and
- WHEREAS the Reverend Jerry
Falwell has thundered from his pulpit the divine
revelation that Teletubby Tinky-Winky is homosexual;
and
- WHEREAS this pronouncement is
bothering Cestoûr parents, who are concerned;
and
- WHEREAS they are showing their
concern in bothersome and noisy ways; and
- WHEREAS we need to show our
Cestoûr subjects we have their general welfare in
mind; and
- WHEREAS no one knows which
divinity has vouchsafed the Reverend Falwell this
revelation;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby asks
His Majesty the King to appoint a Royal Teletubby Sexual
Orientation Determination Commission, also to be
familiarly known as the Noo-Noo Commission, to consist of
four commissioners, Domnul Tað, Domnul
Întorziun, Domnul Çauçlë, and
Domnul Bezinâ (Lords Prong, Squiggle, Circle, and
Triangle) to meet in solemn conclave and determine
whether Teletubby Tinky-Winky is homosexual (or some
other type of sexuality) and which deity (or opposite)
told this to the Reverend Falwell.
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R
Z
4
4
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The Commissioner
of the Civil Service Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: Matt Dabrowski (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS occasionally it becomes
necessary for the PM to have a guy that will actually
do something required by law; and
- WHEREAS it may not be expedient
to have a Cabinet Minister take on the task;
- THEREFORE the Ziu creates the
Office of the Commissioner of the Civil Service. The
Commissioner will be appointed by the Prime Minister, and
be a non-partisan position akin to the IM and the SoS.
Don't ever say that nobody in Talossa does
anything.
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R
Z
4
5
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The Viscount of
Vuode Title Act
Noi urent q'estadra
så: Matt Dabrowski & R. Ben Madison
(PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS some Vuodeans have
decided that, even though they may like the possibility
of having a non-Ben King, they'd still like a Ben
Viscount;
- THEREFORE the Ziu orders a
referendum to co-incide with the next Clark, to decide
the following change of the 1997 Organic Law: "That in
Article III, Section 3, the phrase 'Viscount of Vuode'
will be deleted."; and
- THEREFORE the title of Viscount
of Vuode will, with the passage of this bill and the
referendum reside in the person of Ben Madison outside
his position as King; and
- THEREFORE since the title is
Vuodean, the Ziu sends it back to Vuode, so they can lop
Ben's head off if they feel like it. Whatever. It's up to
them, because We Like Provinces(tm).
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R
Z
4
6
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The Not-So
Hostile Take-Over of Atatürk Act
Noi urent q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode); Tomás
Gariçéir
(ind.-Atatürk)
- WHEREAS the Province of
Atatürk currently has no regularly-constituted form
of government, and no identifiable provincial leadership;
and
- WHEREAS Art. XVI:Sec. 13. of
the Organic Law of the Kingdom of Talossa grants the
Federal Government the right to intervene in any
"uncertified" province to suppress disorder and secure
the blessings of liberty to it and its posterity,
etc.;
- THEREFORE the Ziu of Talossa
hereby establishes direct, central rule of Atatürk
Province under the direction of the Prime Minister, who
shall appoint Tomás Gariçéir as
Military Governor of Atatürk Province, to restore
order in the Province and assist its people in writing a
constitution and restoring internal democracy at the
earliest feasible opportunity.
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R
Z
4
7
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The Porto Claro
Congratulation Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa
established "relations" with the micronation of Porto
Claro in October, 1996 (RC 40); and
- WHEREAS Porto Claro has since
broken up into at least three competing factions and/or
split-offs, each with some degree of
legitimacy;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby
pronounces that RC 40 is null and void, and that Talossa
has no formal relations with any of the Porto Claro
successor states; and
- FURTHERMORE that the Kingdom of
Talossa expresses its thanks and gratitude to the
non-Aguiar Porto Claro successor state called the
"Kingdom of Porto Claro", which has on several occasions
dealt with Talossa on a kind and generous basis of mutual
respect worthy of a sovereign nation.
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R
Z
4
8
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The Mowameddo
Non-recognition Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa
established "relations" with a micronation calling itself
"Mowameddo" in December of 1997 (RZ 28); and
- WHEREAS there has been
absolutely no contact whatsoever with this group since
they were "recognized", and they may in fact no longer
exist; and
- WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa
clearly derives no objective benefit from retaining this
dead-letter "recognition" on its statutes;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby
pronounces that RZ 28 of December 1997 is
repealed.
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R
Z
4
9
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The Mascouten
Tribe of Indians Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS according to the
researches of The Berber Project, the
last surviving Talossan Berber
population in the Greater Talossan Area was
the shadowy and mysterious
Mascouten Tribe, who lived in the Milwaukee area
until 1759 or thereabouts;
and
- WHEREAS the entire Mascouten
tribe was broken up by 1815 and assimilated into various
other tribes, including the Miami Indians of Indiana;
and
- WHEREAS Citizen Brent Kesler of
Talossa is of Miami (and therefore possibly Mascouten)
descent;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby grants
an official charter to "The Mascouten Tribe Of Indians,"
as a private organization under the direction of R. Ben
Madison, to pursue Talossa's Native American and Berber
migrant heritage.
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R
Z
5
0
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The
"Semi-Permeable Wall" Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: Gregory A. Tisher (ZPT-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the overwhelming
majority of Talossan citizens have no use or care for the
bathtubbia antics and pretensions of the silly
micronations out there --- beyond an encouraging sense of
"we're been there, you too can succeed as a serious
micronation" grounded in Talossa's historical founding in
a Milwaukee teenager's bedroom; and
- WHEREAS a vocal and influential
minority of the Talossan Establishment (whatever that
might be) violently opposes any and all contact with
serious micronations out there, namely those exploring
notions of "nationality" as created or (to paraphrase
Benedict Anderson's book and concept of the same name)
"imagined communities" and the hobby of "playing
country"; and
- WHEREAS the intellectual debate
between those Talossans in the prior and other Talossans
(whose interests in serious micronations are similar to
how individual photography, gaming, conlang, and other
hobby groups are often curious about other like groups
due to a desire to learn from their ideas and expand
their hobby's horizons) has oftentimes grown heated and
intense and thereby shifted energies away from the
teleological growth of Talossan institutions of
government, culture, language, and society onto
irrelevant viciousness about the meaning of Talossan
"patriotism" as either "orthodoxy" or "diversity";
and
- WHEREAS a "micronation" or a
"nationette" or an "imagined community" or a
micropatrological entity (all of which describes Talossa
in broad terms of "we know it when we see it") ought to
be Self-, and not Other-, legitimizing; that is, ought to
be and is respected due to its domestic institutions,
culture, and people;
- THEREFORE the Ziu resolves that
a "Semi-Permeable Wall" ought to be and is the Official
External Policy of the Kingdom of Talossa.
Specifically,
- 1. the Ziu stipulates that
all official micronational diplomatic recognitions by
the Government of Talossa, whether by legislation,
executive fiat, or implicit policy, are hereby
withdrawn and disavowed in the spirit of goodwill and
friendship that they were initially offered;
and
2. the Ziu stipulates by
statute that the Government of Talossa will have no
relations with any micronation in any form;
and
3. the Ziu requests that the
Prime Minister thank the Micronational Affairs
Minister for his time, efforts, and service to the
Kingdom, and then close that Ministry as contrary to
the wishes of the Talossan people as expressed through
their elected representatives; and
4. the Ziu requests that the
Prime Minister thank his Envoys and Ambassadors,
including his representative to the League of
Secessionist States (L.O.S.S.), for their time,
efforts, and service to the Kingdom, and then close
all official micronational contacts, including
Talossan membership in L.O.S.S.; and
5. the Ziu stipulates that no
part of this Act is intended to limit the free speech
and assembly rights of or discriminate against any and
all Talossan citizens to privately associate with any
individual of their own choosing, including citizens
of other micronations.
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R
Z
5
1
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The "Padlock the
Foreign Ministry" Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: Gregory A. Tisher (ZPT-Vuode)
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R
Z
5
2
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The Morning-After
Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: Matt Dabrowski (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the majority of the
Kingdom of Talossa's inhabitants are the Cestoûrs,
who are members of the American culture; and
- WHEREAS in American culture,
the majority of social problems - e.g. teen pregnancy,
school overcrowding, abusive relationships, and so on -
are caused by one thing: people having children that they
don't want and/or can't care for; and
- WHEREAS so far not a single
American national politician has the balls to come out in
support of the one thing that could singificantly reduce
the cause of these problems, and only one American state
has approved of this solution;
- THEREFORE the Kingdom of
Talossa approves and legalizes the so-called
"morning-after pill" for over-the-counter sale within our
borders. That is, as soon as we run the
place.
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R
Z
5
3
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The One Less Tie
Act
Noi urent q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode); Ián
Anglatzarâ (Ind.
Lib.-Cézembre)
- WHEREAS according to LZ31 of
July 1998 the Kingdom of Talossa established diplomatic
relations with the so-called micronation of Triparia;
and
- WHEREAS Talossa has decided it
is not a "micronation";
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby
repeals LZ31 of July 1998 and ends any and all official
and formal relations with Triparia.
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R
Z
5
4
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The Not So
Hostile Take-Over of Maricopa Act
Noi urent q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode); Albrec'ht Stolfi (ZPT
or RCT?.-Maricopa)
- WHEREAS the Province of
Maricopa currently has no regularly-constituted form of
government, and no identifiable provincial leadership;
and
- WHEREAS Art. XVI:Sec. 13. of
the Organic Law of the Kingdom of Talossa grants the
Federal Government the right to intervene in any
"uncertified" province to suppress disorder and secure
the blessings of liberty to it and its posterity,
etc.;
- THEREFORE the Ziu of Talossa
hereby establishes direct, central rule of Maricopa
Province under the direction of the Prime Minister, who
shall appoint Albrec'ht Stolfi as Military Governor of
Maricopa Province, to restore order in the Province and
lead it forward into constitutional democracy once
again.
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R
Z
5
5
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The Reunion
Non-recognition Act
Uréu q'estadra
så: R. Ben Madison (PC-Vuode)
- WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa
established "relations" with a micronation calling itself
"Reunion" in July of 1998 (RZ 33); and
- WHEREAS there has been
absolutely no contact whatsoever with this group since
they were "recognized", and they may in fact no longer
exist; and
- WHEREAS the Kingdom of Talossa
clearly derives no objective benefit from retaining this
dead-letter "recognition" on its statutes;
- THEREFORE the Ziu hereby
pronounces that RZ 33 of July 1998 is
repealed.
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